This is a great story. Share it with your loved ones.


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------


So I'm waking to the bathroom at work like a fucking madman because i have to take the browns to the superbowl. My stomachs hurting, andi've bene ripping mean ass for the past hour. that mexican food from last night is talking back to me, and saying it wants an exit. So io walk into the public restroom (which is kept surprisingly clean...) and head to the stalls. Two stalls, one in use, and the handicap one not in use. So hit the handicrapper. I put on the seat cover (read: assgasket) and proceed to drop a bigger load of shit then OJ testifying at his trial...After a good 5 minutes of peeing otu of my asshole, i get a curtesy flush. i believe by now, the smell is so bad that everyone has cleared out of the bathroom. So i'm done, it smells like someone died, but i'm finished. but whats that i hear? foot steps....well i don't want to walk out and having someone turning around from taking a piss, and see me walking out of the handicrapper with a shit eating grin on my face because it smells like ass in there. So i wait.

bingo, i hear steps leading out of the bathroom while i'm making sure my ass is nicely wiped. I proceed to exit, when fuck, another person coming in. No wi'm not usually this paranoid, but fuck, it really does smell like something shot crap all over the walls and smeared it all over the toilet. So he exits, and i proceed to the check out (sink..). As i open the door, i'm astonished to see what i feared the most. A, must have been 15 year old kid, in a wheelchair. Face was completely red from holding his breath he had to go so bad. i didn't hear him roll up, because, well, he doesn't walk. he rolls in after giving me a dirty look. As i'm washing my hands i hear in a kids voice, "What fucking died in here? inconsiderate ass holes!" i about died laughing, and went back to work.